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Old 12-03-2009, 08:05 AM
frezingbelow frezingbelow is offline
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Default Tiger Woods Jokes

From another forum I visit:

Got some TW jokes? Post em up! I'll start with the ones I've seen and heard so far!

Mr & Mrs. Woods 2009 Christmas Picture

What do Tiger Woods and Baby Seals have in common?
Both are clubbed by Scandinavians.

Apparently the police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him. She said "I don't know exactly... but put me down for a 5."

What's the difference between a Cadillac and a golf ball?
Tiger can drive a golf ball 400 yards.

We now see that Tiger drives very well on the fairway but doesn't fare very well on the driveway.

What do the Ryder Cup and Tiger's house have in common?
They are both places where Tiger gets beat by Europeans.

Today, Ping Golf announced it is signing Ms. Woods to a multi-million dollar naming and endorsement deal for it's new line of women's fairway woods. Their new slogan; "Elin Woods - clubs you can beat Tiger with"

He's not a tiger...he's a cheetah!

Of course, he blamed it on a problem with his Escalade.
Whenever a golfer hits a tree, he ALWAYS blames it on his Caddie.

After the crash Tiger Woods car still worked, except it goes putt , putt, putt!

Tough year for tiger. 2nd time he has been beaten by a nine iron

A sign you've got WAY too much money: Not only does your home arcade pinball machine consist of your driveway, an Escalade, fire hydrant, tree, and angry wife swinging a golf club, you think you'll never end up becoming the ball.

It turns out that fixing Tiger's game and fixing his marriage both require the same thing: better control over his putz.

Phil Mickelson contacted Tiger's wife to pick up some tips on how to beat Tiger.

Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one

What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning?
They were clubbing.

Elin's excuse? She had to play a bad lie.

Why did Tiger leave the house so early?
He had a 2:30 tree time.

Q:Why did Tiger take the Cadillac?
A:Because he can't get the Buick Open anymore.

What was the first thing Tiger said to his wife after putting the Escalade into a Tree?
"Can I improve my lie?"
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