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  #11  
Old 11-07-2012, 04:47 PM
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I guess that i am from a broken family, although my parents were together when i went into the Navy. After i got out & returned home for a short period, my parents were still in the same house, although i believe now that things were not going that well.
After i left again, to live in California to be on my own & live the wild life, they had apparently separated or divorced. My mother passed away in an auto accident, heavy fog. Then my Dad died from a stroke or 3
The other 6 brothers & sisters were still home & were raised in a different atmosphere.
Only the twin sisters talk to each other on a fairly regular basis.
The others don't hardly communicate, except for special occasions, like xmas & when i go back east to visit.
One brother had several children, one sister had a boy, one sister had 2 boys but they were raised by the twins. the other 3 chose not to have children.

I guess children from split up parents, are affected, all in their own way

Just do what you can to keep the children together to give them the best family life possible, under the circumstances
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Last edited by GTyankee; 11-07-2012 at 04:50 PM.
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  #12  
Old 11-07-2012, 05:29 PM
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I Have to agree with Andrew (fastnugly) on this one, sorry to seclude anyone elses responses to this his just stuck out alot in my mind.

I know if I was in that situation, me myself I would probably rough it out for the kids I would hide it from them the best I could. For my daughter I would do anything, I am sure your the same, and I know that if it meant suffering and having to pick myself up off the floor everyday and be strong for her to grow up not having a broken home then so be it, I would die for her.

If your both great parents and your not subjecting your daughters to a poor atmosphere of fighting, and cheating. Then I unfortunately would continue to do my best with the situation. Once they are old enough to go off to school and you and your wife have decided to fix or separate they are going to understand the monumental task you did for them, and how unselfish and supportive you were for their needs as children....... I think in the end you wont be picking yourself up off the floor anymore... your going to be holding your head to the sky knowing you were a damn good father and no one could ever take that away from you. Not even a cheating wife...

just my two cents....
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  #13  
Old 11-07-2012, 06:06 PM
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I can forgive a lot of things but another man in my house is not one of them, if it were me the marriage would be over!
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Old 11-07-2012, 06:08 PM
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You ask a personel question to a bunch of strangers I take it so you can be given honest responces. Well than here is mine!

Run! Run and never look back. Are you kidding me? 6 guys? I can understand once with a smooth talker and she got caught in the moment. But 6? In my own bed? If you love your kids you would not expose them to such a mother! Get proof she cheats, get custody with invitation rights. Hand her a dildo and Take out the trash. You only live once! Live it the way you want it and how you deserve it. You dont have to put up with anything.
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Old 11-07-2012, 08:17 PM
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Well my two cents would be to get out of there. Coming from parents that divorced when I was the same age as your children, I think they will grow up to be fine, I know me and my brother did. I don't even really remember when my parents were together, only bits and pieces. I love both my parents still and they can get along when around each other but it just wasn't meant to be for them to be together. I think if you're going to go for a divorce it is best to do it when they are young instead of older. It will be harder for them the older they are. Again, just my two cents, but I think enough is enough and you need to respect yourself now and be done with her.
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  #16  
Old 11-07-2012, 08:39 PM
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I only read your post, and I'm sorry and feel for you, this is a major problem, that I believe the only thing you can do is step off.
I understand you have kids, and you want to keep the family together, but pick your self and run......
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Old 11-07-2012, 08:42 PM
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My response is gonna' be real brief as I don't believe in airing my laundary in public in any format.... especially on an internet board.

So.....

It's never the same the second time around..... NEVER! Put her on foot patrol.
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  #18  
Old 11-07-2012, 08:59 PM
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I have a friend that dealt with this last year with his wife and it went on for a couple of years and she said she would stop and loved him and kids *they have 4* Things were ok for a bit then *dance lesson's* started again and it was the same routine. He got out finally and things are going great for him and the kids they have joint custody. I have a co-worker that was on the other end he had affairs and was doing all the stuff that your wife is/was and he was very honest about it when he talked about it as it is in the past. He would do anything and say anything to his wife at the time but he knew he wasn't giving up this affair. You stated your wife said she didn't know if she could let go of this guy. I think that right there is a sign for you. You say you are like Columbo trust your gut and get out. Also not sure if I would hide her lies from her family it is then condoning the actions. Your kids will be fine and stay in their lives. They will be more unhappy in the future if they found out you stayed with there mother for them. Kids also have good instincts and can tell when things aren't right. So staying with a woman that has admitted she can't give this guy up basically tells you that this isn't a marriage anymore. Just my thoughts on this and best of luck to you and I totally feel for you. There are times for second chances this might not be the one or even the 3rd and it isn't like it was just one or two times it has been many times/guys
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Old 11-07-2012, 09:22 PM
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From a woman's point of view:

One affair, maybe, but six? Once a cheater always a cheater and now that the trust is broken, not sure what kind of counseling could ever fix that.

Happy parents are good parents, staying for the kids just creates a tense environment. If it means the parents aren't together then so be it.

No one can tell you what to do, we aren't you and don't walk in your shoes but I would tell you to listen to your instinct because that is what you will end up following. I wish you the best, this isn't a fun situation.
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  #20  
Old 11-07-2012, 10:54 PM
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I agree with Bluejet and most others on here. Once a cheater, always a cheater. My dad did this to my mom when i was young. The fact that my mom left him was the best thing for her and me. It was hard at first, but we made it and were happier than ever. No one on here can tell you what to do, but i would leave. the kids will be ok. they will be happier if you are both happier. I am so sorry man I definitely feel for you. i will pray that everything works out. and if you are a Christian, you should too.

BTW- as soon as i found out that they had sex in my house, let alone my bed, i would have taken the kids, told her entire family, and left. especially if it had been done more than once. IMO.

Regardless, i hope everything works out. Just keep faith in God.
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