DODGE RAM FORUM - Ram Forums and Owners Club! - Dodge Truck Forum

Go Back   DODGE RAM FORUM - Ram Forums and Owners Club! - Dodge Truck Forum > Dodge Ram Forum - Off Topic > Off Topic Discussion > Jokes/Humor


Notices


Latest Vendor News
AutoAnything
Addictive Desert Designs!
United Radio
Bayou Goat Mounts

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 10-31-2011, 09:26 PM
erm
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Hit The Floor!!!

On a recent weekend in Atlantic City , a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine.

She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her room. I'll be right back and we'll go to eat' she told her husband and carried the coin-laden bucket to the elevator.

As she was about to walk into the elevator she noticed two men already aboard. Both were black. One of them was very tall and had an intimidating figure. The woman froze. Her first thought was: 'These two are going to rob me.'

Her next thought was: 'Don't be a bigot, they look like perfectly nice gentlemen.' But racial stereotypes are powerful, and fear immobilized her.

Avoiding eye contact, she turned around stiffly and faced the elevator doors as they closed.

A second passed, and then another second, and then another. Her fear increased! The elevator didn't move. Panic consumed her. 'My God' she thought, I'm trapped and about to be robbed!

Her heart plummeted. Perspiration poured from every pore.

Then one of the men said, 'Hit the floor.'

Instinct told her to do what they told her.

The bucket of quarters flew upwards as she threw out her arms and collapsed on the elevator floor. A shower of coins rained down on her.

'Take my money and spare me', she prayed.

More seconds passed. She heard one of the men say politely, 'Ma'am, if you'll just tell us what floor you're going to, we'll push the button.'

The one who said it had a little trouble getting the words out. He was trying mightily to hold in a belly laugh. The woman lifted her head and looked up at the two men. They reached down to help her up.

Confused, she struggled to her feet. 'When I told my friend here to hit the floor,' said the average sized one, I meant that he should hit the elevator button for our floor. I didn't mean for you to hit the floor, ma'am.' He spoke genially. He bit his lip. It was obvious he was having a hard time not laughing.

The woman thought: 'My God, what a spectacle I've made of myself.'

She was too humiliated to speak. The three of them gathered up the strewn quarters and refilled her bucket.

When the elevator arrived at her floor they then insisted on walking her to her room. She seemed a little unsteady on her feet, and they were afraid she might not make it down the corridor.

At her door they bid her a good evening.

As she slipped into her room she could hear them roaring with laughter as they walked back to the elevator.

The woman brushed herself off. She pulled herself together and went downstairs for dinner with her husband.

The next morning flowers were delivered to her room; a dozen roses.

Attached to EACH rose was a crisp one hundred-dollar bill.

The card said: 'Thanks for the best laugh we've had in years.

It was signed…Eddie Murphy & Michael Jackson
Reply With Quote
Sponsored links
  #2  
Old 11-02-2011, 01:59 PM
moparornocar72's Avatar
moparornocar72 moparornocar72 is offline
Dodge Ram Forum Member

 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Auburn, AL
Age: 26
Posts: 3,666
Gender: Male
Vehicle: 2010 Dodge Ram
Trim Level: Big Horn
Color: Mineral Grey
Engine: 2009-20?? 345ci (5.7L) Hemi V8 390hp 407lb/ft
Rep Power: 7
Rep:630
moparornocar72 is a name known to allmoparornocar72 is a name known to allmoparornocar72 is a name known to allmoparornocar72 is a name known to allmoparornocar72 is a name known to allmoparornocar72 is a name known to all
Default

haha now that is good, wasn't expecting the eddie murphy and michael jackson at the end either.
__________________
14.268 @ 95 MPH Full Trim

Proudly Sponsored by Bully's Performance
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 11-03-2011, 05:27 PM
CajunDodge's Avatar
CajunDodge CajunDodge is offline
Administrator




 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Morgan City, LA
Age: 38
Posts: 45,544
Gender: Female
Vehicle: 2008 Dodge RAM 1500
Trim Level: ST SWB Regular Cab
Color: Bright Silver Metallic
Engine: 2002-2008 226ci (3.7L) Magnum/PowerTech V6 215hp 235lb/ft
Rep Power: 36
Rep:4069
CajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond repute
Default

That was good, I wasn't expecting that ending either!

- Cajun
__________________
CajunDodge - 2008 Dodge RAM 1500 ST SWB, Bright Silver Metallic, Magnum V-6

New to RamForumZ? Introduce yourself in the NEWBIE CHECKIN!
Need help? PM me or leave a message on my PROFILE PAGE!
Enjoy RamForumZ? Support your forum and become a SITE SUPPORTER today!
Like a member's post? Let 'em know and add some REP POINTS!
Please be sure you understand the Ram ForumZ RULES!

Who Dat Nation Super Bowl XLIV Champions - Geaux Saints!!!

ASE certified Automotive Parts Specialist
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 11-03-2011, 06:51 PM
CdnoilRAM's Avatar
CdnoilRAM CdnoilRAM is offline
I push the skinny pedal


 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Calgary, AB, CA
Age: 31
Posts: 17,274
Gender: Male
Vehicle: 2009 Blown 349 Hemi
Trim Level: Sport - Modified
Color: Brilliant Black/Snake Skin Green
Engine: 2009-2012 345ci (5.7L) Hemi V8 390hp 407lb/ft
Rep Power: 20
Rep:3277
CdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond reputeCdnoilRAM has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Lol, that was a good one. Definately wasn't expecting the ending... but it must have been a VERY old joke. Michael Jackson hasn't been black in a long time.
__________________
Sponsored by Bully's Performance
Green Mamba '09 Ram 1500 QCRB 4x4 Sport - dropped, blown, and bottle fed
Kurtis
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 11-03-2011, 06:56 PM
CajunDodge's Avatar
CajunDodge CajunDodge is offline
Administrator




 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Morgan City, LA
Age: 38
Posts: 45,544
Gender: Female
Vehicle: 2008 Dodge RAM 1500
Trim Level: ST SWB Regular Cab
Color: Bright Silver Metallic
Engine: 2002-2008 226ci (3.7L) Magnum/PowerTech V6 215hp 235lb/ft
Rep Power: 36
Rep:4069
CajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond reputeCajunDodge has a reputation beyond repute
Default

LOL @ Kurtis, so true!

- Cajun
__________________
CajunDodge - 2008 Dodge RAM 1500 ST SWB, Bright Silver Metallic, Magnum V-6

New to RamForumZ? Introduce yourself in the NEWBIE CHECKIN!
Need help? PM me or leave a message on my PROFILE PAGE!
Enjoy RamForumZ? Support your forum and become a SITE SUPPORTER today!
Like a member's post? Let 'em know and add some REP POINTS!
Please be sure you understand the Ram ForumZ RULES!

Who Dat Nation Super Bowl XLIV Champions - Geaux Saints!!!

ASE certified Automotive Parts Specialist
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 11-03-2011, 07:01 PM
GTyankee's Avatar
GTyankee GTyankee is offline
Dodge Ram Forum Member

 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: San Diego East County, Ca
Posts: 19,042
Gender: Male
Vehicle: 2009 Dodge Ram 1500 2X4
Trim Level: quad cab SLT
Color: sunburst orange pearl
Rep Power: 20
Rep:2615
GTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond reputeGTyankee has a reputation beyond repute
Default

I saw this a year or 2 ago
I still got tears in my eyes, when i read it, sooo funny

when i read back then, i was thinking either the Football Linebacker or the Sacramento Kings Basketball player,
not the drugged up singer
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael...disambiguation)
__________________
Ram 1500 SLT Quad cab, 5.7 HEMI(R) MDS VCT, 5 speed auto 545RFE, 3.55 differential gears, 18" Magnaflow muffler, EGR bug deflector, Bushwacker fender flares, customized Nfab nerf bars, CB radio, Autonet wi-fi router, custom soft tonneau cover, Line_X bedliner, DEBO Step, build date 10/15/08 a Wednesday built vehicle

Last edited by GTyankee; 11-03-2011 at 07:10 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 11-04-2011, 10:31 AM
sonocativo's Avatar
sonocativo sonocativo is offline
Dodge Ram Forum Senior Member!
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Rehabbing (a house that is )
Posts: 1,554
Gender: Male
Vehicle: 1997 Dodge Ram 1500 4x4 club
Trim Level: Laramie
Color: Electric Blue
Engine: 1994-1997 360ci (5.9L) Magnum V8 230hp
Rep Power: 4
Rep:210
sonocativo has a spectacular aura aboutsonocativo has a spectacular aura aboutsonocativo has a spectacular aura about
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CdnoilRAM View Post
Lol, that was a good one. Definately wasn't expecting the ending... but it must have been a VERY old joke. Michael Jackson hasn't been black in a long time.
Man that brings back memmories of an old friend where I used to work. He is black and very short 5' max... He had a few inter-racial marriages. One evening he was watching some old music videos of Michael jackson and mentioned the name, His young son jumped up and said: "THAT'S NOT MICHAEL JACKSON, MICHAEL JACKSON IS WHITE" .....lol
after a long explaination to him that he IS black and why he looks like he does his son asks:"WHY WOULD ANYONE DO THAT TO THEMSELVES?"...LOL

So, if you want a good laugh just say something in front of the kids like his buddy did about teletubbies.
" Hey isnt that one supposed to be gay?"
and your response would be a little guy yelling at you with...
"HE'S NOT GAY, THATS A MAJIC BAG" and alot of the little guys friends looking like they are gonna open a can of whoop azz on ya...lol

Kids, ya gotta love em !
__________________
Mike
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 11-04-2011, 11:34 PM
old hot rod's Avatar
old hot rod old hot rod is offline
Dodge Ram Forum Senior Member!
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Lebanon,TN
Age: 45
Posts: 5,177
Gender: Male
Vehicle: 2010 Dodge Ram 1500 4x4
Trim Level: Big Horn
Color: Bright Silver Metallic
Rep Power: 7
Rep:386
old hot rod is just really niceold hot rod is just really niceold hot rod is just really niceold hot rod is just really nice
Send a message via Yahoo to old hot rod
Default

Good one,
Keep them coming!!!
__________________
Hell Bent Steel Leveling kit, K & N filter, Tinted Windows,
Mufflex DOD18M, Mopar Intergrated Trailer Brake,
DiabloSport Predator (U7137) 180 Thermostat, WeatherTech Vent Visors
DiabloSport Catch Can (C-1040)
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Floor Lighting Stump3r Custom Dodge Ram Interior and Exterior Lighting 38 11-09-2014 03:27 PM
Weather Tech All Weather Floor Mats-Check The Codes Dodge Ram General Discussion 4 09-29-2011 10:15 PM
Weatherized Floor Mats RazorTips Dodge Ram General Discussion 12 08-19-2011 11:55 AM
Where to get replacement vinyl floor covering or carpet? BruteEngine 2009 Dodge Ram Forum 5 07-14-2011 04:22 PM
Something dripped on the front passenger side floor mat.... LonghornLaramie 2010 Dodge Ram Forum 13 02-15-2011 05:38 PM


Advertisement






All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:13 AM.


= Copyright RamForumZ.com a Gigathreads.com Network Site =Ad Management by RedTyger
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
vB.Sponsors


=Gigathreads Network=
CLUBS MOPAR NATION DSM GPMM MAMM JAM
DIESEL Diesel Forum      
CHEVY Chevy Camaro Forum Chevy Volt Forum    
CHRYSLER Chrysler 300C Forum      
DODGE Dodge Avenger Forum Dodge Caliber Forum Dodge Challenger Forum Dodge Charger Forum
  Dodge Circuit Forum Dodge Hornet Forum Dodge Magnum Forum Dodge Nitro Forum
  Dodge Ram Forum Dodge Dakota Forum Dodge Durango Forum Dodge Dart Forum
FORD Ford Raptor Forum Ford F150 Forum Ford F100 Forum  
JEEP Jeep Forum      
PONTIAC Pontiac G8 Forum      
SRT SRT Viper Forum SRT Cuda Forum